to pray for

²¹From that time on Jesus began to explain to his disciples that he must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things at the hands of the elders, chief priests and teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and on the third day be raised to life.²²Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. "Never, Lord!" he said. "This shall never happen to you!"²³Jesus turned and said to Peter, "Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men.

²⁴Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. ²⁵For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.²⁶What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?²⁷For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father's glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what he has done. ²⁸I tell you the truth, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom."'

Matthew 16: 23-28

Before church yesterday, Charles and I had a thought provoking talk about our future. We had some miscommunication and I was frustrated that I didn't have my facts straight. Beyond that though was the real heart issue. I was scared. I am scared. Marriage is so exciting and I can't wait to marry my best friend but I realized that I was overlooking what marriage entails. He will be the leader and I will be his helper. I want to be able to leave everything behind, my father and mother, my family and all the comforts of home to follow where God brings us as a couple but it is scary. The verses above really convicted me at church. I realized that I am clinging on to the things of this world, the things of man. Instead, I must set my mind to the things of God.

I am so thankful that God knows exactly what it is that I need to hear and I was quickly humbled by my own sins. Charles and I have been trying harder to put everything into prayer, all the little and big decisions including our wedding planning, but also just praying more for our time engaged that we may day by day become more of a man or a woman after God's heart. I'm trying not to worry about the things in the future, trusting God in the every day, praying and realizing that I must give God my time right now too, and not just planning for how I will be giving God my life after we get married

Prayer points:

- to be intentional at home with my family to show them my love, respect, honoring my parents

- God will use this season to prepare me to be the wife He intends me to be for my future husband

- be patient, not anxious for the future, valuing each and every day He has given me

- take advantage of every opportunity to build relationships with my family, especially my mother and gain insight from all of her wisdom

- handle schoolwork and serving at church with a pure heart